Halloween from 2009-2012

Sweet words from Aubs

I just had to document the conversation that Aubrey & I had today to remember these precious moments.

Aubrey: thank you mommy for my lunch & my pizza & my Halloween costume.
Me: aww! You're so sweet baby. Thank u for being my kid.
Aubrey: thank I for being my mommy. I LOVE YOU! *gives me a big kiss*

My heart melts!!!

Sometimes the fight ends sad & too soon...

I love this picture yet it makes me so sad to see it now.
I lost my beloved aunt to cancer this past week. Aunt Ronnie always has been & always will be one of my favorite aunts and actually favorite people in general.
She was diagnosed with breast cancer which spend into her lungs even after a mastectomy and thinking they had gotten it all. I watched her suffer for the past several months & I now know she his resting peacefully in Heaven. I was with her in her final moments along with my Grandma & my dad. She was loved by so many & will be missed by everyone that knew her.
Losing her to cancer has just opened me even more to fighting for awareness of all cancers but especially breast cancer. I don't want anyone else or their families to go through what we all have gone through. It's unimaginable to watch someone you love so much suffer. I told her this saying when we were realizing that she was terminal & I truly believe that's why she hung around fighting for so long. I told her she was the strongest person & if anyone could kick cancers butt, she could. My heart is broken & there will forever be a hole for her. I miss her so much already & its only been a few days.
I love you to the moon & back Aunt Ronnie, & I'm so glad you are no longer hurting. I know you're going to be my guardian angel now, because from day one you've always had my back & nothing, not even death, can change that. Rest in Peace.
Rhonda Jean Lane
2/12/58-10/16/11

Sometimes the fight ends sad...

Bernie: Once again, resilient Redbirds refuse to lose : Stltoday

Bernie: Once again, resilient Redbirds refuse to lose : Stltoday

No compassion at all...

Without going into detail because I don't feel like loosing my job & license for breech of HIPPA, but I had a rough night at work the other day. Long story short, I was supposed to take a NICU
Team to one hospital to pick up a sick baby, & transport back to a more advanced facility. We never were able to transport the baby, because he passed away after all of us working to revive him for hours. There was nothing we could do, it was inevitable, but still a devastating experience. All along I assumed it would only take a few hours because it was a close transfer. Well, after it was all over it was more like 6 hours. The delay caused me to miss taking a midterm in one of my online classes that was only "available" for a bread timeframe. I explained to my professor the situation without detail, & requested that due to the situation, he please let me make up the exam. I received his email this morning to which he replied, 

"Sara,

That sounds like a horrible situation that you were pulled into at the last minute, and I do understand that things happen at the last minute sometimes, and that is why I set the entire class up at the beginning of the semester instead of adding it week by week. I'm afraid I can't accommodate your request."

Seriously?!?!?!? WTF?!?!?

The exam was available for one day! Not all semester. 

I try to help save a babies life & he can't have a little understanding! I'm so irate! I don't feel this is in anyway my fault. Without this midterm I'll be lucky to get a B, in what should be one of the easiest classes in college. I'm calling BULLSHIT! 

And to make matters worse, I feel like a shithole for being upset about midterm when a family is grieving the loss of their baby! I completely realize that there was nothing we could do, & that it was Gods decision to take that baby to heaven, but it doesn't make any of it easier. 

I'm so sick of stupid school & their ridiculous bullshit politics. All I ever wanted to do was to go to school and get my degree so I could help people. 

Here I am working 2 jobs, going to school, & balancing a family, & this assface can't give me an hour to take an online exam. Someone please tell me that I'm not being irrational?!? 

Moving!... Again....

My life is a crazy mess! Seriously.. If I ever get a second to actually sit and breathe, I will write a legit post catching up on everything...
Anyway.. For now.. We are moving. Again.
It's a long story.. & an issue not our fault, but we out moving from our current home. We've loved this house, & are very sad to leave it, but its happening. Our lease would be up in December anyway, so it's just as well, while we found something we love! Our new house is much bigger, & we are gaining a bathroom & main level laundry!!(that's a big deal to most mamas!), Aubs & I are also gaining some HUGE walk-in closets!( that's an even bigger deal to most girls, especially girls like me with an unGodly amount of shoes! 😉) overall I'm very excited about the house, but also a little nervous... It's at the very tip top peak of the budget I figured out for housing. Scary, but just means to be more conservative on other things. (Like for instance, went on vaca this past week.. Found the cutest Coach bag on a ridiculous clearance price... Passed it up. VERY hard for me, but budget first, designer bag later!)
Anyway, lots of packing and sorting going on at our house, but not to slow down on anything else... 2 jobs, school, or life! New house pics to come!